You saved my daughter's life

From: Betty

Dear Jessica, I will be grateful to you forever. You don't even know me or my daughter, but I want you to know that you saved her life. Let me explain!

My husband and I have ridden just about our whole lives and we have always had horses, before we were married, and for the last twelve years since we have been married. He doesn't ride now because of his health, but my daughter Katie and I ride for pleasure. Our horses are "just horses", mostly Quarter Horses and one Arabian, but they aren't show horses, and we just enjoy them and ride on a lot of beautiful trails in the woods. So what does all this have to do with my daughter, I am sure you are wondering?

My husband and I used to ride Western. I still do, but my daughter (11 years old in October) has had some English riding lessons and now she does all of her riding in an English saddle, even on trails because she says it is more comfortable for her. She still uses her Western bridle. Most of the kids in our area ride in baseball caps or cowboy hats. A few of them wear helmets but it's still pretty unusual to see helmets around here.

Anyway here's where you come into this story! One of my friends is a lot more serious rider than I am, and she went to one of your clinics last year and was real impressed. She wants to buy all of your books, and this summer she bought your new book for parents and brought it over to our place for our annual 4th of July picnic. We spent most of the day reading it to each other and our families and we really enjoyed it. I couldn't sleep that night because of thinking about the chapter you wrote about helmets. I knew that helmets were considered to be "safer" than other riding hats, but I didn't really understand why they were safer or how they worked until I read your book. Also, I always thought that the danger of falling was that you could land with your head on a rock or a piece of farm machinery or something else hard. I had no idea that the brain damage and death can come from landing in a flat grass field! Nobody ever explained or even mentioned what happens to a person's brain when they have a fall, so I was very interested to read that, and also horrified to think that I was letting Katie ride without a real helmet.

I took her into town the first day after that when stores were open, and we both bought ASTM helmets and agreed that we would never ride without wearing them! We got some questions from friends, and I started carrying your "Parent's Guide to Horseback Riding" with me in my saddle bags so that I could show it to people when they asked. You know how it is when you learn something important, you want to share with all your friends. Anyway exactly one week ago Katie had a really horrible fall when her horse slipped and went down in the woods. Katie got thrown out of her saddle sideways and hit her head really hard on a tree. I was right behind her and I saw her horse suddenly twist and fall, and Katie just flew out of the saddle and her head hit the tree with a huge CRACK sound. I was terrified. Katie was a little confused about how she fell, so we went back home at a walk and I drove her to the hospital for xrays. We took her helmet to show to the doctor -- it had a big crack across the top and one side. He said that Katie was fine, and he looked at the helmet and whistled, and asked about it, and I told him everything I could remember from your book about how the helmets work, and how Katie used to ride in a baseball cap. He said "It sounds to me like that book and that helmet saved your little girl's life. If her head had taken the blow instead of her helmet, she'd be dead or dying right now."

So I just wanted to write to you and say THANK YOU and bless you. I wrote this to HORSE SENSE instead of in a private e-mail because I really hope you will publish it. Maybe there's another Mom out there who will say to herself "Maybe I should read that book and make my kid wear a helmet". I hope so. Thank you, thank you, thank you.

Betty

ps. Please don't change the title, because as far as I'm concerned YOU saved Katie!

You did so many things right, Betty! First, you educated yourself, so that you understood why helmets are so important for riders. Second, you acted: you followed up on your reading by going out and buying ASTM/SEI approved helmets that fit. Third, you made yourself part of the solution. Children respond well to sincerity, to information, to education, and to example, and you provided your daughter with all of these things. Your buying Katie a helmet wouldn't necessarily mean that Katie would wear it for every ride, but you didn't just buy her a helmet. You bought the most protective helmets for Katie and yourself, you discussed why it was important to wear ASTM/SEI-approved helmets, and you and Katie agreed that you would both wear them for riding.

I'm truly delighted that you think that the "Parent's Guide to Horseback Riding" was the catalyst for your decision. I have to admit that I was very pleased to be able to include a full chapter on helmets and how they work. But YOU are the one who read the book, and YOU are the one who took Katie to the tack shop and purchased the best helmets. You are also the one who saw your daughter's head hit the tree, and you are the one who heard the helmet crack as it did what it was designed to do... and you are the one who took Katie to the hospital to get x-rays. ALL of that was exactly right. Well done you!

It's generous of you to say that I saved your daughter's life, but it was YOUR actions, not my writing, that did the job. I'm very glad to have been part of that process, but reach around with one hand and pat YOURSELF on the back, please. You deserve it. And now YOU may become the catalyst for some other parent saving a child's life -- believe me, no parent is going to ignore what you've written. The helmet lesson is one that no parent wants to learn the hard way. Thank you for writing.

Jessica

Back to top.

Jessica Jahiel's HORSE-SENSE is a free, subscriber-supported electronic Q&A email newsletter which deals with all aspects of horses, their management, riding, and training. For more information, please visit www.horse-sense.org

Please visit Jessica Jahiel: Holistic Horsemanship® [www.jessicajahiel.com] for more information on Jessica Jahiel's clinics, video lessons, phone consultations, books, articles, columns, and expert witness and litigation consultant services.